Least Frequently Asked Questions
It is the nature of a FAQ that the questions in the FAQ are actually the least frequently asked. This is because if you read the question on a frequently asked question page then you know the answer so you are unlikely to ever ask the question.
Who is Perfidious Albert?
He is a big A-Team fan, and also…
In nineteen seventy something, a crack software developer was born in a maternity hospital to a mother that deserved better. This man promptly questioned everything by constantly asking “why?”, and even more annoyingly “why not?”. Today, not wanted by any employers, he survives as a freelance e-commerce expert and software consultant. If you have a problem, if no one else can help and if you can find him. Maybe you can hire, Perfidious Albert.
What Does Perfidious Mean? Isn't That Bad?
It means untrustworthy. It’s the name of the crow. We had a logo before a name, and we called him Albert. At around that time Brexit was happening and every time we turned on Newstalk they were talking about Perfidious Albion. Two and two became five and before you know it, we were sitting at boardroom tables explaining how we could be trusted despite the company name meaning untrustworthy.
But Why a Crow? Aren't They Bad?
We have long been a fan of crows. They are the ultimate problem solvers. They are tenacious and they stick with it through the hard times of winter instead of running off to Africa (or probably flying off to Africa). They are loyal and intelligent. They can be cranky but treat them well and they will leave you gifts and be your friend. What’s not to like?
If you like crows as much as we do check out this amazing work by artist Eamonn McCrory in Belfast.
Why should I use Perfidious Albert?
If you like an easy life, you probably shouldn’t. We are disagreeable and hard to work with. We hate taking shortcuts. Our moral values tend to favour the little guy. We don’t compromise easily. We will challenge you. We will challenge your ideas. We will challenge your knowledge.
Ruairi has 25 years of experience and built his first website just 6 years after Tim Berners-Lee invented the world wide web. He has worked for Microsoft, General Electric, and even An Garda Síochána. He built a fully custom e-commerce platform at around the same time Shopify was first building theirs. He has just finished building a world class e-commerce ticketing system for Rathlin Ferry and Department for Infrastructure in Northern Ireland. He knows his onions.
Will I be on top of Google?
Only if Google is a pet name for your pool boy. SEO is a skilled job that takes time and dedication. Perfidious Albert is dedicated, but not to SEO. What I can do is point you towards the best SEO expert in Ireland.
Will I be able to update my own website?
I will insist you learn how to use Shopify and that you will love working on your own website. If you need us we are here.
Do you outsource?
No. Software developers in countries where most outsourcing happens get paid about €1 per hour and they need to get the work done fast in order to feed their family and keep them alive. As a result of this they equate software development with building a wall - forget the foundations, just get it built, plaster over it, and get paid. I don't blame them and people who outsource to these markets deserve the crap they get back. We might occasionally outsource to developers that are based in Ireland and that we know and trust - you will always know when this happens and why.
How long does it take to get my website live?
Perfidious Albert is middle aged. He drinks too much single pot still Irish whiskey and eats too much low and slow barbequed grass fed Irish beef. It is in your interest to work as quickly as he does. Simple e-commerce websites can and should be live in under a week, but the consultation and business building will take longer. Larger business applications could take 6 months. If your project is bigger than that I will probably direct you elsewhere.
How much will it cost me?
It won't. We make money for businesses like yours. You really need to speak to us.
