Least Frequently Asked Questions
It is the nature of a FAQ that the questions in the FAQ are actually the least frequently asked. This is because if you read the question on a frequently asked question page then you know the answer, so you are unlikely to ever ask the question.
Who is Perfidious Albert?
He is a big A-Team fan, and also…
In nineteen seventy something, a crack software developer was born in a maternity hospital to a mother that deserved better. This man promptly questioned everything by constantly asking “why?”, and even more annoyingly “why not?”. Today, not wanted by any employers, he survives as a freelance e-commerce expert and software consultant. If you have a problem, if no one else can help and if you can find him. Maybe you can hire, Perfidious Albert.
What does perfidious mean? Isn't that bad?
It means untrustworthy. It’s the name of the crow. We had a logo before a name, and we called him Albert. At around that time Brexit was happening and every time we turned on Newstalk they were talking about Perfidious Albion. Two and two became five and before you know it, we were sitting at boardroom tables explaining how we could be trusted despite the company name meaning untrustworthy.
But why a crow? Aren't they bad?
We have long been a fan of crows. They are the ultimate problem solvers. They are tenacious and they stick with it through the hard times of winter instead of running off to Africa (or flying off to Africa). They are loyal and intelligent. They can be cranky but treat them well and they will leave you gifts and be your friend. What’s not to like?
If you like crows as much as we do check out this amazing work by artist Eamonn McCrory in Belfast.
Why should I use Perfidious Albert?
If you like an easy life, you probably shouldn’t. We are disagreeable and hard to work with. We hate taking shortcuts. Our moral values tend to favour the little guy. We don’t compromise easily. We will challenge you. We will challenge your ideas. We will challenge your knowledge.
Ruairi has 25 years of experience and built his first website just 6 years after Tim Berners-Lee invented the world wide web. He has worked for Microsoft, General Electric, and even An Garda Síochána. He built a fully custom e-commerce platform at around the same time Shopify was first building theirs. He has just finished building a world class e-commerce ticketing system for Rathlin Ferry and Department for Infrastructure in Northern Ireland. He knows his onions.
Will I be on top of Google?
SEO is a skilled job that takes time and dedication. Perfidious Albert is dedicated, but not to SEO so much.
However, and this is important - SEO is very much subject to the 80:20 rule. 80% of good SEO comes from 20% of the work and it just so happens that the same work is also required for good e-commerce conversion rates and profitability. So even though we don't do the last 20% you might not need it depending on how competitive your industry is. Save your money for now is what we are saying!
Will I be able to update my own website?
Yes - we don't keep control of anything and Shopify is very easy to work on. If you ever need to work on your own website it will be easy and intuitive.
Do you outsource abroad?
No. Software developers in countries where most outsourcing happens get paid about €1 per hour and they need to get the work done fast in order to feed their family and keep themselves alive. As a result of this the quality of their work is usually horrendous.
We have worked with some amazing developers from Asia - easily the best in Ireland, but the industry they come from back home is rotten to the core. We won't work on websites that have been developed using cheap labour as it is not a good experience for us, and it is a false economy for you.
We do rarely outsource to other Irish or UK based agencies, but you will always know when that happens.
What's with the old vans?
Laura hates stock photos and Ruairi is obsessed with taking photos of old VW vans (he also owns one). So the solution to what photos to use on the website was obvious. Actually, no - it wasn't. But we did it anyway!
![think inside the box think inside the box](https://perfidiousalbert.com/hubfs/think.jpg)
Thinking Outside The Box
I disinterestedly advised a colleague once to "think outside the box" after he shared a problem with me. His reply was "ah go and shite". I queried this slightly disrespectful tone with him and he had the following defence to offer.
"The answer is always inside the box."
In the years since I have come to realise that the man was and still is a genius. He was also correct. The answer is never outside the box. Inside the box is education, experience, and intuition. Outside the box is uncharted territory, half baked ideas, and inexperienced fools that know no better.
Or, there is another theory that there is no box. Either way thinking outside the box is a meaningless concept that Perfidious Albert dislikes intensely. So if you want inside the box thinking that is proven, fast, economical, and efficient - then contact us.